Friday, February 15, 2008

Gainfully Employed Writers

The writers' strike is settled; we can all go back to vegeing in front of the plasma screen, confident that we will now have quality entertainment rather than a plethora of reality shows featuring people even more stupid than we are (maybe . . . Come to think of it, we're the watchers. Doesn't that make us . . . never mind.)

To celebrate, the Los Angeles Times asked writers to pen Op-Ed pieces for the Feb. 13, 2008 edition. No one wrote anything serious, thankfully, which made the Op-Ed page much more readable that usual. No link--the Times doesn't keep articles up for more than a week or two. But here's a sampling.

Tim Long, writer and Executive Producer of The Simpsons:

I began the strike with lofty plans to write a novel, which soon turned into a novella, which then turned into 13 solid weeks of playing "Guitar Hero III" in my underpants.

Ken Levine, writer for Mash, Cheers, and Frazier:

The great American novel that I started four strikes ago is almost done. I figure one more strike, two at the most . . . So I've got a target date of 2014, but I'm close. Really close. I can feel it.

Frank Pierson, who wrote Dog Day Afternoon:

Write an Op-Ed piece? Sure. Haiku-like
They'll change it
Cut my heart out
Old story.

I'm so glad they're back at work. I want those literary agents free to deal with ME.

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